Pregnant in Japan Part I

I am the proud mother of a beautiful three month old boy in Ichinomiya, Japan. I thought it was time to document the process of being pregnant and having a baby in another country. Some have asked what my experience has been like. Plus I hope it will be helpful for any women who become pregnant in Japan that are looking to read everything they can from other people. While this is my first baby it's not my first pregnancy, so I hope this will help others who have or will go through this.

I first became pregnant in July of 2012. I discovered in August that I was around 6 weeks pregnant. I had a mix of emotions as it was a complete surprise. As soon as I told my mother she said that I had to go to the doctor. I was completely lost as to what I should do. I didn't want to tell my co-worker, because I was not sure what the policy of pregnancy was at my job. So, we talked to one of our Japanese friends who wrote down some things in Japanese that I thought a doctor might need to know. I was not sure exactly where to go because you can either go to the OBGYN in the hospital or to a 'Ladies Clinic'. These clinics specialize in babies. They are usually a bit more than a hospital. They also offer a few more amenities too. We just decided to go to a ladies clinic that was just a short walk from our house.

Thankfully, with our hand written note and our limited Japanese, we were able to get the paper work done and see the doctor. The doctor was extremely awkward.  He wrote in his note pad in English, but would not let me see it. He didn't speak English even though he was writing notes in English. He was going full speed in Japanese and asking me questions that I could not answer. I did not expect him to speak English, but I thought he'd at least slow down. After all, I was pregnant for the first time.

He then gave me an exam. I was so surprised because the way they examine you is so different than the states. American women all know how that goes so I don't need to go into details. However, here you go into another room that is in the same room that you talk to the doctor. There is a curtain and a chair. You should take off your pants and sit in this chair. The chair is electronic and it puts you in the perfect position. The curtain is at your waist so you can not see the doctor as they examine you. There was a monitor on my side so that I could see the ultrasound. It was totally weird. I am still not sure how I feel about that. In one way it takes away that awkwardness of someone looking at you and the other way it's strange that you can't see what they are doing.

Take off your pants get a towel and have a seat. The chair does the rest.

Try not to get any visuals of what the doctor sees from this angle. 

After the exam he quickly told me in Japanese that I would probably have a miscarriage. I was so worried. It was a difficult time. After a few days I sadly miscarried at around 7 weeks. It was a very emotional time in my life. It's hard to really understand the feelings you have unless it has happened to you. I never wanted to talk about to people because it was so painful. It was very painful seeing all these pregnant women walking around, the facebook notices of others getting pregnant and worst of all the calendar. Like many women, one of the first things you do is go to babycenter and calculate your due date. You see the lay out of how many weeks you will be at different points. For me I had already known when I'd be 10 weeks and 14 and so on.

Once the miscarriage began I went to the doctor's, because it was a small clinic he recommended I go to the hospital. He could not confirm if it were an actual miscarriage, a tubal pregnancy or something else. That ladies clinic only caters to normal pregnancies. If anything looks like it is going to go wrong then they send you to the hospital. So, I went to the hospital.

Once at the hospital I had to wait a few hours before I could see a doctor. This is standard for hospitals or clinics for your first visit. You can not make appointments. The only appointments you will have is if the doctor wants to see you again. If you have a problem you just have to wait, you can not call it in. The hospital had the same sort of set up like the clinic where there was a separate room with a curtain and electronic chair.

I was told I had probably had a miscarriage. At that time they saw a lump on my tube. The doctor was not sure what it was. She said they may have to operate.I had a choice to do it that day or wait a few days to see what happens. I waited. I was praying along with so many others that everything would be ok. When I went back thank God the lump was completely gone. I still have no clue as to what it was. She then confirmed that I had most likely had miscarried. They had taken my blood both times and could to see the HCG level going lower. She then wanted me to come back the next week and every week until my HCG level was completely back to normal. That was strange to me, but I guess they like to be very thorough here.

At the time I had a private health insurance that did not cover pregnancy related things. So, I was paying out pocket each time. I was very surprised at the prices. The first first was about 100 dollars. The next visits went down to around 70 dollars and towards my last few visits 30 dollars. I was shocked at how cheap it was! Shortly after I joined the Japanese National Health insurance and they paid me back 70% of all my bills. So, had I had it before I would have only paid 30% of the total price.

Finally by the end of September I was finished with going to the doctor's. I am glad they made sure everything was OK, but I felt like the experience and reminder of what was just lingered on for so long. I knew I would become pregnant again, I just wasn't sure when and how long it would take.You feel little broken after an experience like that. I am thankful it happened early on I can not imagine how women feel when they carry a child for months and lose the baby. I also knew in my heart that I would get pregnant again and that by some miracle it would happen before what would have been the first due date of my first pregnancy. While every conception is precious and special and we mourn the loss of that pregnancy we can take comfort in the joy that comes out of the loss. I'm sorry I didn't have that baby, but I can not imagine my life without my beautiful baby boy who would not be here now if it weren't for what happened. I love him so much and I am so glad he is here!!